It was yet another one of those nights. On the first glance everything seemed perfectly normal; the little leaves, visible from her room’s window, were dancing slowly as if they were invited to do so by the wind himself, breathing soundlessly. The stars shone bright against the dark sky and the whole street, lit ever so slightly by an old streetlamp looked as though no one had walked the little alleys in years. Of course this was only a peaceful lie the night brought with it, a story that would turn into nothingness as soon as the first rays of sunlight would bring yet another load of tourists with it. They would be swarming the streets all day long; making it difficult to enjoy the magic you could feel setting in at night time. Years ago she had loved this time of day – or night rather – in which it took not too much imagination at all to truly believe to be the only awake person alive. She used to sit by the windows watching the sky trying out all different kinds of blue, just like a girl in a dress shop. She would look up towards the stars, trying to find a hidden meaning within their constellation, but most of all she would just enjoy the moment of complete peace only the night time could bring. All of those feelings seemed to belong to another time, another girl completely now.

It was yet another one of those nights, in which the sleeplessness held her hostage. Even though this had happened every night for the last few weeks without fail, it was still impossible to point out exactly why it was so hard for her to fall asleep, or why her mind had started to find pleasure in going through all kinds of different scenarios, just in that very moment she closes her eyes. The only thing that she could be sure of now that she was sitting by the windows once again, was the feeling of pure exhaustion that was trying to overwhelm her. The sky seemed dark and she could no longer find joy in watching the colour slowly changing. The stars merely laughed at her from a distance, as if they were in on a secret that she would never be able to encounter. And as for the peace she had loved so much, all those years ago; the peace was still there, still spreading the old promise of being alone in the world, but never quite lonely none the less. But it just wasn’t the same. Not the same at all. She let out a sigh, almost too quite to be called an actual sound, but still loud enough to force away the silence’s tight hug for a fraction of a second.

Gliding a hand through her cinnamon coloured hair, she got up at last, shooting a last look towards the sky; half willing the old feeling to come back and comfort her in this situation, half wishing to see the world outside just vanishing into nothingness, only so that she would not have to see all the same things over and over again.

 

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